Dreams Are Made of These

Floating. Darkness. Air. Breath. Cold. Shock. The room was white and bright that I could see almost every spec of dirt on the floor. Of how I came to this, I had no clue, it was like I was sucked and forced into this blinding area from nothingness. Void to existence--I wasn't and then I was. The seemingly endless rows of metallic tables, tiled sinks, and glass cabinets were aligned and built precisely, that they looked like one of each when gazed from the right direction. The comfortable yet strong odor of antiseptic combined with the smell of drugs and other chemicals float in the air as the beeps and clicks of the apparatuses fill the silence. I watched, as cerulean eyes studied the fall of golden drops released by the pipetol as it turned the colorless liquid in the Erlenmeyer flask, to green. The result must've been a good one because I heard his sigh of relief. The blue-eyed man--William--carefully grasped the flask containing the green, swishing liquid, brought it to eye level, and poured something from the petri dish he uncovered. Bacteria. How do I know these? A feeling of piled information that I couldn't understand swept over me, that later I understood as confusion. Curiosity nudged me to get a glimpse of my appearance. The urge to know what existence had given me crawled under my skin. What do I look like? I went to one of the cabinet glasses to check my reflection, but I saw nothing of me. It was like I was there but was not-like an existence that myself only could acknowledge. I could see when I had no eyes, I could feel when I had no skin, I could smell when I had no nose, I could hear when I had no ears, and I could taste the bitterness of my situation. I heard myself intake a sharp breath, exhaling fast, and then inhaling again. Panic. What am I? "This will finally be our long awaited success," William remarked as he walked to his colleague who was standing in front of a big cylindrical container in the far end of the room. Andrew. I--walked? Floated?--towards them. At first, I couldn't see what they were looking and deeming as their success because their big frames were blocking it. And then I saw, a child, no more than a year old, floats in the center of the tank, a mask covering its little, pale face a tube attached to it, connecting it to the bottom of the container. The small creature was curled in a fetal position seeming to protect itself from scrutinizing eyes and the harshness of the world. I went closer, almost pressing my nonexistent face to the glass. My gaze focused on her face--for unknown divine reason, I knew that she was a girl--mesmerized at how peaceful she seemed amidst the creepy, cynical place she was in. The men continued to converse about chemicals, formulas, and processes. I paid them no heed, and unbrokenly stared, fascinated by this being. What are you doing here, little one? Where are your parents? I tried to talk to her but it looked like I was the only one that could hear my imaginary voice. My sight couldn't seem to look away from the child. I studied her long eyelashes that contrasted her pasty-white skin along with her longish, swaying hair due to the water in the tank. Her tiny thumbs on either side of the mask that I was slowly finding distressful. Why was a baby taken to this place? Just seeing her from the other side of the tank, I could tell that she was in pain, and I long to ease that away even if it was the only thing I would be able to do--to lessen her suffering. I stroked the glass barrier near her head, hoping to get my touch through. Everything will be alright. You will grow safe, away from this place. I meant what I said, for unknown reasons, I felt really close to this being. I felt that we seemed to have met in another occurrence. I tried to figure out what was the connection why she was familiar, but I threw myself away from the tank, surprised when she suddenly opened her eyes, which bored directly at me. The shattered diamonds of orbs that could ostensibly see through my nonexistent body, making my imaginary heart beat faster and roar louder. The men stopped talking and stared in awe, seeming to have witnessed this event for the first time. Not until the clicking and beeping of the machines became erratic did they start to move. Whipping their clipboards and jotting down furiously. "Well, this was a rather surprising improvement. I thought she'll never wake up." Andrew, despite his swift writing talked calmly. My gaze, still fixated from hers, I moved not in my place because of the sudden fear that crashed over me. It was not of mine, it was the baby's. "Just think of the millions and billions we'll profit through it. If making and growing a baby in the lab would've came to my mind the first trials, we wouldn't have stolen those incompetent ones from hospitals long ago." The cackle from William fueled my fury that tamped the fear of the little girl. But I couldn't tear my sight away from her, I struggled to break free of the force that suddenly wrapped itself around me. Her almost-white silver-grey eyes appeared to suck me to her, she seemed to draw closer and closer and closer until I was pressed to her tank. My breath came in and out of me in fast intakes. She looked like she would devour my existence and I struggled to get free, but my attempts were futile. One. A voice whispered in my mind. You are me. The feeling of being sucked back in the darkness started to swept over me. And then, I fell and fell, and fell in the pit of nothingness. I waved my imaginary hands in different direction hoping to grasp something to hold on to, I screamed as loud as I could, hoping that someone would hear me and salvage. I continued to fall and felt the thud of my illusory back as it came contact to the black ground, my breath rushed out of me. Then, nothing, just the numbness and darkness of everything. A prick poked my skin. There were loud, repetitive sounds coming from everywhere. "T-35, when will you open those pretty shutters of yours?" Came a muffled, deep voice. "We've pumped her enough modified strain 121 DNA to blow an entire city, she should be waking up any day now," replied another muffled voice. There was a suppressed light in the darkness, I felt my eyelids tremble and slowly peeled them open. My heart nearly jumped out of my mouth when I saw huge faces sneering down at me, what was more shocking was, these were the faces of William and Andrew. I gasped and panted and tried to draw as much air as I can in my constricted lungs. How? Why? I screamed but no voice came out. How was I inside the tank? Wasn't the baby-? Bubbles started to float from under me. I was the baby. My fear mixed with panic and more bubbles came up, I wanted to claw the glass but I couldn't move. The bubbles came in rapid succession that it made the tank looked like it was boiling. I was suffocating with all the effervescence produced, but I still tried to draw breath. I forced and fisted my tiny hands to seemingly draw more breathable air from the tube, I could hear myself gasping and wheezing- I sat up fast like a bullet, panting with sweat soaking my tank top. I stayed still and remembered where I was as the adrenaline slowly receded, and felt the dizziness crashed in my head like a tsunami wave. "What a messed up dream," I tell myself, running a shaky hand down my clammy, teary face.