Chapter 18

CHAPTER 17 LUKE "Grandpa, you can't do this" "Yes I can. I am king." He stubbornly says, his hands tightening on the arm of the chair. We made eye contact with each other. His nose is flaring as he glares at me. I sigh. "Yes, I know, Grandpa, " resigned, I settled back on the chair, " I know you are king which is why I am trying to insist that you should consider." "Why should I consider? I do what I want because I can!" his voice raise as he glared at me. I bit the inside of my cheek and said, "But grandpa, if I cancel the engagement it will appear as though I am not serious. The people will doubt my credibility." "That is not true. They will trust whatever you do and support you. How can a broken engagement destroy your reign as king? They will forget about it once you marry Fleur, and that is final." "Grandpa please, give me a month. I am still not sure of my feelings. Do not rush me into this things, please…" I pleaded, my voice thickening with emotions. The king look at me from his wheelchair, his face unreadable. I watch as he push a button and turn his back on me, "Alright. Another month it is then. Settle everything and get this over with." He huffed, stirring his wheelchair towards the window, "The girl has asked to go so I allowed her." He added, his fist still balled up on his sides. "This is your last chance, my boy. Next time, it won't be so easy like this." His voice rang with finality. I sat there for a moment, staring at the window with him. After a while, I sigh and bid my goodbyes. He did not reply. I went out the door and headed up to the fifth floor, knocking, I was surprise when a maid let me in, "Carol, who is it?" her tearful voice rang out. I peek in to see clothes sprawled on the bed. The maid whose name is Carol, look at me in the eye before answering, "It's the crown prince, miss." She curtsied at me before opening the door and letting me in. Reluctantly, I went inside. My hands sweaty as I swallowed. My tongue felt like a foreign thing in my mouth. I couldn't think. I breathe in and out while I stood there, my thoughts in a jumble. I watch as she went out of the closet, her hair like mane framing her flushed face. She was breath taking. I swallowed once again and just stood there. " I am sorry everything is a mess." She motioned towards her clothes piled up in one side of her bed. Carol left the room in a rush and I just stood there, watching Neola. She pet the small kitten that has been dozing beneath the pile of clothes. She wipes her eyes and avoided looking at me." I will be leaving after lunch. Don't worry I won't leave a mess. I just have to find a way to fit half of these inside my suitcase. It will be so pretty to wear these during winter time. The king have allowed me to take it so—" I held her hand which made her stop talking. She looks at me, her eyes puffy. I love how her face appears so soft when she is crying. I hate seeing her like this. I caress her cheek and wipe the tear that slowly fell down. "Neo, you re blubbering. You are not making any sense." She sobbed and push my hand away. "I know. I just can't understand why I feel this way because I really wanted to run away from all this. I do not want to stay but every time I try to, my heart felt like its breaking, " She sniffed before she sat down on the floor. She close her eyes. My chest painfully tighten at the sight of her breaking down. I can't just watch her like this. My jaw tightened, I pull her up from the floor and held her close. Her hands automatically tangle themselves on my neck as she struggled for support. We stay like that for awhile. My chest is bursting with happiness. I wanted to kiss her right then and there but I can't. I don't want to take advantage of her when she is this vulnerable. She might break even more. Pulling away from her, I look down to see that she has stopped crying. Clearing my throat, I said, "You are leaving then?" she nodded. I lick my lips and continue, "For how long?" She looks up and whispered, "I don't know. Forever, I guess?" Her eyes were glassy. I turn my head so I won't see her crying again. " Nobody wants me here. There's a new girl and the king loves her. You are falling for her, you spend most of your time with her ever since she arrives. You even laugh with her when Midnight chase me at the garden. I was so embarrass, I can't even join you at lunch." I watch her as she wring her fingers and huffed, " and during the dinner, when the king told me about the choice and you, it felt like I have already lose you without even having the chance to fight. It felt unfair but I have to accept and yield." She looks up at me, her hands slowly inching towards my face. She caress my jaw, tickling it as her hand brush my stubble. She tearfully smiled at me, "I have no chance, do I?" My heart carefully thudded inside my chest as though it was afraid it will be heard. I know the answer to her question, ever since that night I saw her at the ball, I know the answer hasn't changed. She is the one for me and no one will be. But I have to risk it. I have to make a decision even though it might hurt the both of us. Sighing, I took her hands and kiss it. She sobbed. "You have a chance, " I whispered to her making her cry even more, "You really do." "Then why are we doing this then? Why are you making me confuse by being with that girl and not me? You can marry me now, we are already engaged." She says, her voice breaking but her confidence unfathomable. I am right, she has the spirit of a queen. She would make a great queen. Smiling at her, I pulled her close and whispered slowly, as though I was talking to a child, "Because I have to make sure that you are not pressured in this. I want you to have a choice like I do. I don't want you to regret being with me and bear the burden of a kingdom." I tighten my arms around her and continue, "I want you to have a normal life. Know that whatever happens, in the end I will be waiting. If fate allowed us to meet after five years, I know the same will happen. If we are really meant to be together, then I couldn't hope for more..." She looks at the mountain and whispered, "I guess, snow will be a pretty sight here when winter finally comes." I sigh, embracing her tight and tucking her in. We stayed like that for a while. My arms around her, her face nestled in my chest. It was one of the sweetest memory I will have and probably, it will be engraved in my soul. The both of us stood there, both ready of the future we will face after all this. When the bell rings to signal lunch time, I let go of her. She stared at me, her eyes unfathomable. It was like the both of us is wearing an invisible armour to face a battle about to exist. I help her with her things. No words were exchange between us. Through the intercom, I ask Carol to bring us some lunch. Neo did not suggest any food she likes even when I ask her. She just nods at me, no words spoken but it is not done in a harsh way. It was like we can understand each other even with no words. It was like a connection we have achieved in the past that has now resurrected. Carol arrived when we have already finish packing the first suitcase. She put the tray on the table by the balcony and I thank her with it. Neola quickly finish her hand-carry bag and the both of us sat by the balcony. Baked potatoes were wrapped in parchment paper. Carol included some pumpkin soup and bread to accompany our delicious lunch. We still did not talk as we eat. I steal some glances at her face. Slowly, her pudgy face returns to her ever glowing serene face though her eyes held some sadness. I felt guilty for making her feel this way but I have to. Taking her hand on mine, I said, "You know, in time, you will understand why I did this. You will thank me later on." She shook her head before she throw her arms around me and sobbed. Quickly, I rearrange her on my lap, and soothe her back. "Shh, please Neola. Please stop crying, you are making it hard for me, too." The wind blew, the smell of rain about to come stings my eyes that I am slowly tearing up. "But, " she looks at me, sobbing, "why do I feel like you are doing something wrong? It felt like you are abandoning me. You are letting me go, " her words are my undoing, I cried. "Neo, I am not abandoning you, alright? Once everything is finally in place and you are ready, I will go back to you. I promise, " and I kiss her like there is no tomorrow. Indeed, there is none for us. My lips curve into a smile as the first flurry of snow melted on my cheek. "I will always love you, " my whisper made her shiver and I chuckle. 계속 *** Hey guys, how are you? So, what can you say about this chapter? Thoughts...anyone?