FIFTY EIGHT: RECKLESS

That afternoon, we all crashed at one of the guy's apartments. His name was Chris. His whole body was covered in tattoos and he had a piercing in his left ear. I didn't know him, neither did I know how Miranda got to meet him, until after some hours that we woke up, in a large room in his house. The bed I was lying on was large, and exquisite. In fact, the room was beautifully furnished. The owner must be a millionaire at least, if not a billionaire. When I opened my eyes, I tried to scrutinize my environment but I was clueless. It was not my first time waking up in a strange place, but I was very scared this time. I only calmed down when I saw Miranda sprawled on the floor before me. The other girls were on the floor too, fast asleep. Phoebe's belt had come loose. Josephine was snoring. I was the only one on the bed. The door was slightly open. My head was banging hard. The room looked like one of the rooms on TV adverts. It was extremely beautiful and well designed of course. At a point, before I saw my other partners-in-crime, so-to-speak, I thought it was Robin's master bedroom in the Were-castle. So I was a little disappointed when I realized it wasn't. I stood up to look for the bathroom because I wanted- no, needed to wash my face, and empty my bowels. I found one, full of mirrors and when I returned to the room feeling better, I found that Miranda was up too. She looked peaceful, surprisingly. "Chris went out, he said we could have his room to ourselves", she paused, "Why do you have that look on your face?" She retorted. She staggered past me, towards the bathroom, without waiting for an answer. Asides from her staggering, she seemed fine. "Who's Chris?" I queried "My boyfriend" she said. "The guy with tats" I wanted to laugh and smack her face at the same time because I thought it was crazy for her to have a boyfriend at eleven. Okay,maybe twelve? That's still awfully young. I thought she was probably pulling my legs. What more was this girl capable of? I was sure her mother and brother didn't know she had a boyfriend who was at least ten years older than she was. I had been wondering where she got the guts to go against her mom and do some adult things from, but now I knew. Chris was her source. The twenty-one year old rich guy with tats. He must have been the 'him' who smuggled pizza into our room that fateful night. The moment she told me Chris was her boyfriend, Miranda's personality started to scare me. But it was hard to stop being friends with her. "We have a pool party by 7pm tonight. It lasts till dawn. I told Chris but he said it was not so cool. He insisted he'd join us and that we should only spend an hour" she said. "I don't want to spend one hour. I want to spend all night at the pool" Bad influence. I thought. Without responding to her, I laid on the bed trying to read from my book. It was a guide to knowing if it was okay for me to do some things or not, like attend the pool party or not. But, Mira snatched it from my hands when I wasn't looking. "Life is not all about books", she said "I'm putting this book away until the holidays are over" I tried to snatch it but she wouldn't let me. My explanation about how important it was to me, fell on deaf ears. I threatened to report to her brother but she told me she'd burn it before I could. That was how I had no access to the book for many days. I don't know if she put it in one of Chris' bags or buried it in the soil but I never found it even when I ransacked her stuff. I could not get mad at her for long because she was only trying to get me in the moment. She had no idea what was going on. And I was not ready to tell her. I was not ready to tell anyone. Later that afternoon, we had lunch at Chris'. I noticed that someone called Miranda repeatedly but she kept declining the calls. After a while, she switched off her phone. I was curious to know who it was, even though I was almost certain it was either her mother or brother. After a while, I got a call on my phone as well. It was Peter. His voice was so loud that I hung up immediately. I did it without thinking. He seemed to be really upset about something. Some minutes later, he called again and asked of our whereabouts. As I did not know how far away from home we were, I handed the phone to Miranda. "Hello Teddy, where are you?" That was Peter. He mostly called his younger sister 'Teddy'. "Having fun. Is anything wrong?" Her usual curt reply. "Mom wants you home right now! She says you've not been taking her calls. What has come over you, Teddy?" It was a bit hilarious that he still called her affectionate pet name despite that he was terribly upset with her. "I don't want to come home right now, bro. Tell Mom we are fine. She should just trust me for once!" She yelled into the phone and slammed it on the table, before mouthing a 'sorry' after she realized it was my phone and not hers. Thankfully, the screen was not broken. It only had a slight crack. "I can't wait to be away from home, for reals!" She yelled at no one in particular, walking further into Chris' apartment. Chris was in the shower because I could hear water dripping in the bathroom. He got back some minutes after we recovered from our hangover. At that point, I had to sincerely plead with Miranda to let us go home. We were going to be grounded for sure. "You have no idea how miserable home is, for me. Mom doesn't let me out. That's why I did not have friends. If not for school and the camp, I might not have met so many people I met today. She thinks if I should go out, it has to be a camp of crazy people where she thinks I'll get treated. Unbelievable!" "Babe, just go home, okay?" I heard his voice clearly this time. It was Chris. He just got out of the bathroom with a towel tied around his waist. His chest was bare. It suddenly felt really wrong to be in the same room as he. He was growwwwnn! "I am not going home" she announced, walking into his room. He followed and closed the door after her. I wondered how much length she was willing to go to show her mother she was capable, and that she was 'normal'. After some minutes, she came out looking more cheerful. "Girls, let's go home" she said. And we left the house. I wondered what Chris had said to her. It seemed Miranda ordered us around all the time and we always obeyed her as if we had no other choice. Actually , that was it. First, she had forced me to cycle up till the next street and return home at half past 10 pm. Second, she had persuaded me to drink booze, now she was asking me(us) to follow her home. I wonder how much of a puppet I've been with her. Little wonder Robinson warned me to steer clear. I was effortlessly influenced by her. It was one of those times I needed him right by me. I had nothing that reminded me of him, except the book. The book that gave me the creeps. Now it had been snatched from me and I didn't know if I'd ever get it again from the rebellious Mira. I seem not to measure up to her strength. Whether emotional strength or willpower, whatever. She had it, enough for all of us. Whatever it was Mrs Harley was summoning us home for, I was glad that she did, because I thought that meant no pool party for us. She wasn't wrong when she called Mira reckless. She was more than reckless. Even her boyfriend affirmed it. The only weird thing about this is that she wasn't always like that. She used to be easygoing and down-to-earth. Did grief make one reckless? I was grieving, grieving the painful loss of Joe, grieving the reality of Robin's absence that's dawned on me. It was like I already knew Iwould never see him again. I would never have him like before, but I could not get myself to accept it or believe it. I mean, that book he gave me was enough proof. It was a guide for me. He did promise to protect me. Perhaps that was why he wrote me that guide, since he knew he wouldn't be here with me for much longer. I was somewhat full of grief because I didn't know if he died or just lost ability to visit the natural world, but was I reckless? Did I get wasted? Did I date a guy ten years older covered in tats? Did I yell at my mom or run away from home? I feel people respond to grief differently, and that's why I chose not to blame Miranda Harley. That's the only reason I'm staying with her-- she is grieving. Who knows? This might be the time she needed someone badly, needed me. So, don't go like, "Hey Ariana, you should stop moving with her. Obey Robin and walk away now that you can.". It's not that easy, lovelies.