Chapter 6

Hot torrents of grief coursed down her face. The panic grows stronger into the evening as her mental faculties give way to emotions. She wanted to jump right out of her skin and join the ether. She felt just like a child again, shaking, terrified. The constricted feelings grow, as if she was strangled by just the air about her. "There's no way you can do this to me. This can never happen to me... NO! I will never marry him. I hate him, Ummah. I hate him.... he's planing to ruin my life, to torture me.... and I will NEVER let that happen!" Hidayah continued screaming, her veil and bun long disappeared, leaving her with a messy hair. "Let's see how you'll stop this wedding from happening tomorrow and you better behave yourself tomorrow because I will not take any foolish act from you, Hidayah...." Without listening to what Ummah was telling her, she scrambled up and bolted out of the room. She ran down the stairs, to his room and barged in, same time he was unbuttoning his shirt. Her pulse sped up and she was breathing very shallow. Ahmad took a glimpse at her and still went ahead to remove his shirt, leaving him with his khaki pants and singlet. It made her more infuriated when he didn't show any anger by the way she barged in. "What the hell do you think you're doing? Are you out of your mind? Who told you that I will ever in my wildest dreams have the desire to marry a horrible person like you...." A smile tugged at the corner of his lips as he checked her out. She had no veil on. Her face was smudge with tears and mascara. She was red by the way she was yelling nonstop. Gorgeous. "If you dare let this wedding hold, by Allah I'll be your worst nightmare and you'll regret ever having the thought of marrying me, Hidayatu Abubakar Rimi!" Ahmad's small crimson lips parted into an O shape. He gave her a knowing look before he shrugged his shoulders and turned away. "Please if you're done, kindly close the door when you're leaving." His voice was so calm, yet husky. He had the type of voice that would have you doing as he said even when he's being polite. Her breath caught as she stared at him in disbelief. She knew if it was on a normal day, he would've started hitting her or at least fired back with more hurtful words but he was so calm and it irritated her more. He ambled towards his bathroom, towel in hand, leaving her there standing as she fumed with anger. Her hands on her head as she wailed in agony. She marched to ummah's as there was no way she would let that happened to her. She collapsed on the floor, dejected, swollen with emotions and realizations of her fate. "Yes, he has a very important course to attend to next week and he won't be back anytime soon that's why we have to move the wedding to tomorrow. I know, I really apologize for the short notice. Okay.... do inform everyone please, I'll try reaching the others." Ummah continued with the phone calls. Hidayah stared at her mother in disbelief. Her own mother would do that to her? The emotion washed over her like a tidal wave. She scrambled to her feet and dashed out of the Ummah's room to hers. With trembling hands, she fetched her phone and called the only person that listens to her, Ummah's immediate younger sister. "Aunty Umaymah.... they want to ruin my life. Ummah doesn't love me anymore. Aunty Umaymah, I don't want to marry him, I don't love him...." her body wracked with an onslaught of sobs and tears. "Hey, hey calm down, Hidayah. What are you talking about? What do you mean by you don't love him? Common, is it because the wedding has been shifted to tomorrow? I understand how you feel, I know you were not expecting everything to happen so fast but..." "Oh so you know about the wedding too?" Hidayah cuts her off. "You knew they were going to marry me off to that wicked man?" Aunty Umaymah's laughter could be heard through phone. "If you don't love Ahmad please tell me who you would love? I've never seen someone so calm, respectful and gentle like him. You are very lucky to have someone with both good looking and good character. In the this generation where the rate of divorce is getting out of hand, you're trying to push him away? Better get yourself together and stop acting this way, Hidayah. You're very lucky to have him as a husband...." A boiling fury swelled inside of her. She cut the call and tossed the phone away, screaming at the top of her voice. She scrambled to her feet at the same time Nafisa came into the room. "I swear I will run away from this house if you guys dare let this wedding hold. I will hurt myself.... better don't let this happen.... Nafisa go tell your feeble-minded brother to call off this wedding..." Hidayah paced around the room, not knowing exactly what to do. She rushed out of the room to Ummah's room, thinking maybe she could talk her out into calling off the wedding. Ummah didn't listen nor have Hidayah a glimpse. •• Nighttime was falling fast. The sun disappeared below the horizon and the sky turned dark. Hidayah curled herself in a ball as she stared at the sky through the window like it was going to give her answers. For the past few hours she had nothing to do but cry because It was her tears that kept her soul alive in the furnace of this pain. She bites her lip to keep her from crying more. She could feel a searing pain in her heart. She heard a soft knock on the door before it creaked ajar and the intruder came in. Nafisa looked at her sister from the place she was standing for brief seconds before she finally moved further into the room. 'Ya Hidayah, I..." she heaved a sigh and gathered her courage to speak again. 'I made some pancakes and I figured you would like some. I made it just the way you like it." She kept the plate and the syrup on the side drawer before she helped Hidayah to sit up. 'Nafisa, I appreciate it but please I would love it if you just leave me alone." Thinking about it made a shudder from her feet travel to her head. 'I'm so sorry this is happening to you. But common, Ya Ahmad is not as bad as you think he is. You of all people should know that because he has been there for us like a big brother. It's not really a bad idea if you get married to him, and besides this is what Ummah wants. For once, don't you want to make her happy? And if you try something rough, you know she'll be the one to get worried the most and.... at long last... you still have to marry him since he was the one that brought the idea." A boiling fury swelled inside of her. She opened her mouth to speak but Aisha beat her to it. 'Nafisa, why are you wasting your time speaking to this air head? Let her go and do whatever she pleases to do since she doesn't know Ya Ahmad is doing her a great favor to marry a wayward person like her. Don't behave and see if those stupid boyfriends of yours will marry you. You better behave yourself Hidayah, else you'll regret whatever it is that you're trying to do." 'Ya Aisha!" Nafisa cuts her off with a warning tone and a dead look. Hidayah took her eyes off Aisha that kept on ranting for no reason. Tears spilt over and flowed down her face like a river escaping a dam. Her vision was blurry; it was difficult for her to see clearly. She has never felt so hopeless in her life. 'You guys will never understand. Yes, I admit that I've done so many bad things to upset Ummah, but this is my life we're talking about. And.... I know... I know that he's not going to marry me because he wants to. He only wants to do that so he could torture me." Her heart was beating so fast, it hurts her chest. Remorse washed over Aisha. She instantly felt the guilty rising inside her. Maybe she should've listened to her side of story before she said those hurtful words to her. She slowly walked out of the room and closed the door. Nafisa wrapped her arm around Hidayah's shoulders. 'Why don't you give it a try? You have always lived your life the way you wanted. So why not change your life for once? For good. Just follow his path and see, I assure you Ya Ahmad would never hurt you like you expect him to. Now, if you won't eat then at least get some sleep, okay? And I am not leaving your side till you fall asleep." Hidayah laid down as she tucked her in. She looked at Nafisa while a smile sneaks out the corner of her mouth. She loves Nafisa, even when they see things differently, their souls were still in stereo.