The Choice 2

"I tried so hard not to care. Tried so hard not think about I am worthy of being loved. But life is just cruel to me." I broke down "No one ever did stay. Not even you. Even Sebastian didn't choose me." 'What did Sebastian do?" Ian asked angrily but I brush him off 'And I think maybe if you were all going to choose, to take care of.me or be happy with this family. I know for a fact that you won't choose me. No one will ever choose me." I sob continuously No one will ever will. "Mom was begging you stay but you didn't" "She wasn't begging me to stay" dad finally says "What?" I whisper looking at him "Tell her..It's her right to know" Selena says "Tell me what?" i ask "Your mom wasn't begging me to stay. She wanted me to leave and not tell you about her having someone else" "WHAT? WHAT KIND OF LIES IS THIS? SHE WASNT with someone else. she loved you everyday. SHE DIED BECAUSE SHE COULDN'T HANDLE THE PAIN YOU RBOUGHT HER and she was sick!" "Yes, it wasn't true. I only found out later that she was sick. If only I fought for her then maybe things would have been different. Before she died, me and Selena asked for her blessing which she allowed." "You're lying to me" I whisper as I shake my head. It can't be. "Stop this nonsense!" I scream 'Kitty, baby It's true. I'm sorry you found this out now. I didn't want to tell you because I didn't want you to be angry with your mom." 'Don't come near me, you're all lying to me!" I shout I sob and my knees felt weak as I fell to the ground. My dad hugged me tight and I didn't resist anymore. 'Dad" I cried in his arms 'Shhhh it's okay. Shhh, always remember that, I'm your dad and this father cat right here will always choose you. No matter how you hate me, I will always choose you" he whispers 'I want to sleep" I just simply say They helped me up and Ian helped me to my room and brought me water before leaving me alone. I stare at the window and not long after I fell asleep. After an hour or so I woke up, with a book beside me. It was my favorite book when I was little. Tangled. I picked it up and read it myself. Then a sudden knock disturbed me. "Hey honey, are you okay?" my dad asks "Yeah just tired. Do you need anything?" "I just wanted to see if you're okay" he says sitting down the bed beside me Silence fell between us. "Don't be afraid of getting hurt, sweetheart" Dad said so suddenly. I didn't have time to react on that but then I felt a tear ran down my face I shake my head. "I am scared of being left behind that shit hurts more than seeing the one you love, loving someone else. Leaving without any explanation hurts and makes you questions yourself where did all go wrong" I smiled " but I'm not afraid of getting hurt, I'm used to it." He hugged me " I'm sorry for what happened before. If I only knew that it would traumatize you like this. I never would've listened to your mom" he says "I know now. You don't have to keep saying sorry" I tell him as I rest my head on his chest. "I know but I just can't help but to blame myself for what happened to you both. If only I was there that time, we could've save her" he tells me "Knowing you love her, is enough for me dad. I forgave you already and when I see mom soon, I'd scold her for not letting you stay" I chuckled "What do you mean soon?" he asks "I mean soon, when I grow old and die" I chuckled. "Okay" he says and laughed. We stayed like that for a minute then after he left to let me rest. I was thinking about something and suddenly a saying pop in my mind. "everyone deserves a second chance even the ones who hurt you intentionally and never said sorry" I didn't know what it meant. But I couldn't find any reason to forgive him. Then my door opens. I look who it was and it was Selena. "Sorry. Did I wake you? I just brought you water and food, I thought you were asleep so I brought it here" "I wasn't asleep. Thank you" I tell her as she puts down the food. "Uhm, okay. I'll leave you be" she says, I curled up and put my hands on top of my knee and rested my chin "Selena, I know I made the right decision but why am I sad?" I asked her She turns around. and tilted her head. "Sorry, I was just confused. Nevermind I asked" I said Then she walked towards me and sat down, tucking my hair on my ear. "Honey, sometimes when you made the right decision, it can make you sad. It's okay to be sad when making the right decision. But can I ask you something?" she looks at me in the eye I didn't talk but instead, urging her to continue. "Are you sure you made the right decision?" "I---" I paused, I thought of it for a while then answered "I think so. I don't know" I whisper my gaze going for the bed she held my hand. It made me look at her. "Are you afraid of something?" she asks "Getting left behind." "Why do you do the thing that fears you?" she asks and something caught my breath it was like harder for me to breathe "I know it would be harder for him if I stayed. Can you keep a secret?" I said and she nodded. I told her what I have been keeping and made her promise to not tell anyone. She was reluctant at first but she agreed. -------- I went out of the room and I found out, Selena and Dad went out to buy groceries which I was confused because there are still a lot of food. I went back to my room and laid down; I was busy staring at the window when Ian came in. 'Mom and dad came back, dad baked some lasagna. He says it was your go to food when you feel bad" 'I don't want to eat" I say Then I felt him sat down on my bed. 'Kristen. Please, you don't have to starve yourself." He says but I didn't answer It's just everything that I went through today, a lasagna won't fix it. He sighed. 'I have someone to fix your stuff to be brought here maybe tomorrow or so, and the school. Since, it's almost done, they said you could be home schooled and go back when you are ready" 'The Student Council Adviser also informed me that you already told him about this and Abby will be the new President for a while until you come back" I know that already. I didn't talk still. I just want this to end as soon as possible, I'm tired of always being like this. Miserable. I deserve more. I deserve better I just know.