55- A mere deal

'When did I become like this? How can I melt in my emotions and fuel his sorrows to the extent he will perish?' Red sadly thought, staring at her hands, devoid of every emotion while looking at two notes of 'sorry' in her hand, confirmed that the person who used to give her a rose back in University is none other than Erich. A tear rolled down her cheek, cursing her heart which cannot connect his heart. On the strayed path she couldn't make her surroundings break. She never thought it would take her almost seven years to find this person but the moment when Red came to her show and Erich sent her a note of apology with a white rose just like before when he never had any fault, hurt her deeply. Red took a deep breath and looked at her reflection in the mirror, "Let's end this." She said to herself. "I will see what pulls us apart." She sighed, curling her hands in a fist and taking a shower to calm her mind for the show. Red got ready, took a survey of her models, putting up her fake smile but she met the person she least wanted to see, J Dot who could literally ruin her mood more. "Oh, J. How are you?" Red asked with a fake smile. He also returned the same venomous smile. "Oh, Red Bennet. Did you lack fame in America that you came here to get it from France as well?" He jeered. Red's smile grew wider as she retorted, "No, of course not. Just wanted to be a messiah of the fashion taste of the people here as you are here well." Her taunted wiped his smile, "You are just a child." He hissed. "That means you are not even born yet." She smirked. "Hmph! That's what you think." He scoffed. "Oh Really? Because if I remember on the previous brand show, my brand was on top." Red said proudly. "Don't be so prideful." He said, gritting his teeth. "I wish it was pride." She replied and rolled her eyes. They both walk past each other, cursing at each other in their minds. The encounter with J Dot increases the loop of despair for Red as it gives it a new negative emotion; wrath. The show went amazing as usual for Red and Peter and Parker took Red to a party for the success of her work. "Dude, I was waiting for you to hold a show here." Peter said. "By the way, do you know? Parker got a girlfriend." Red hummed, staring at her glass, not replying. "Red.. you okay?" Peter asked. "I want to say I am but I am not." Red replied. Her tone was casual, concealed with pain. "What happened? Aren't you happy with Erich?" Red laughed a little to hear this, "Happy... I wonder why I hurt every second person by my demeanor." "Is everything alright?" Parker asked, putting his hand over her shoulder, looking at her worriedly, "Guys, I broke Erich's heart. No, I didn't break but crushed it under my feet." Red said with an empty smile. "He is the one who gave me roses back at the Uni." Red told them as they were amazed to know this, not believing it. "What?" Red nodded and wiped her tears. "Red, and what did you do to him?" Peter asked hesitantly. Red sniffed and got up. "I will be back." She said and got up to leave for the restroom but on her way she saw Lucifer. At first she thought it's the effect of her drink but He was actually there. She stopped and closed her arms at her chest. "Are you following me?" She asked. "Yeah. I wanted to talk to you." He replied. "What is it?" She rudely asked. "Are you alright?" He asked softly, noticing the pain in her eyes. "Why do you care?" She spat. "It means a lot to me," he said sincerely. "I don't think so, leave me alone." She was about to leave but he held her wrist. "Let me go." Red said sternly. "You have changed so much, Red. Why are you hating me when I did nothing?" He asked sadly. "Don't talk to me!" Red shouted but before her mind could register what happened, Lucifer secured her hand behind her back and pinned her to the wall, maintaining a fair distance as she was pinned from front. "You have lost that right, Lucifer." Red whispered breathlessly. "I have lost everything." Lucifer whispered back sadly. "Then leave... and never come back." Her voice was barely composed. "My breaths have your name, Red. If you want me to never come back-" He moved from her neck to her ear and continued, "-then take these breaths away." His voice became hoarse in immense dolor and heartbreak. "It was a compromise." She said, on the verge of breaking. "Ours wasn't a compromise. This is!" He hissed furiously. "Then what was between us!?" She whispered-yelled at him, narrowing her eyes in agony. He gave a profusely compassionate gaze and took a step back, "A bargain... for your liberation." "Huh? Bargain? Are you crazy? It was nothing but a mere deal which contained no place for love." Red stated the fact. "Then why did you cry?!" That's what he wanted badly if she didn't love him then on whose name she shred those tears. "I didn't cry!" "Stop it Red! Why are you lying? Why are you punishing me like this?" He asked in a croaked voice. "It was you who punished me by not coming back, by not recognizing me." "It was only trying to decrease your suffering. You weren't apprehending the delicacy of the situation." Lucifer tried to explain. "And you chose to break my heart over it?" Red asked. "Do you want to complete our tale of love in the jail then tell me, I would happily accept my crime." Lucifer said angrily. "I don't care. Go to hell." Red hissed but Lucifer stopped her, losing his breath as he said desperately, "Red, tell me you never felt anything for me?" Feel what I felt. And with thought she broke another heart by a lie, "No. Never." Lucifer's eyes widened in shock as his lips trembled with tears brimming in his eyes as he stumbled back, letting out a painful laugh along with a tear. Covering his face, hiding his tears but then glared at her with tears glistening on his face, "You know what Red?" He hissed while she gave him her notorious heartbreaking cold look, "You are not the person I once loved." Red's eyes widened as her heart skipped a beat when she heard it. An uneven breath escaped her lips, his words evoked pained emotions from her, a tear stung in her eyes. He was about to leave but she held his cuff, gulping to maintain her posture and asked in a sad whisper, "And what about the pride of the unspoken love?" "The love you didn't even take into recognition?" He asked, turning to her, voice wallowed in dejection. "Does that mean you never did it?" She asked, her voice lingering with the fear of hearing 'Yes'. "If you didn't wait for me, that doesn't mean I never planned to return." Lucifer said sadly, lowering her head. "Then why did you come When I got married!?" Red asked, punching his chest as a tear rolled down her cheek and no matter if she tried to refrain from her emotions, she couldn't. He put his hand over hers and replied, "If you hadn't got married, it would take me another one or two years to get back to you. Red... No matter what, you were my final destination... but.." Lucifer stopped, looking at her with his fragmented gaze as a tear rolled down his cheek. "If you planned to make this an unrequited love... Why did you love me back then!?" He began to cry silently, moving away from her. "You took everything from me!" She cried back. She sniffled and wiped her tears, "I understand everything... I know why you didn't come back and it makes me furious that I fell for you. On one side was Erich, he who loves me endlessly and never dares to break my heart and there's you, you fell in love with my fake identity and when the time to love the real one came, you left me alone!" She sobbed, leaning on the wall. With a profound gaze of pity, Lucifer spoke up, "You.. You have gone crazy Red." Red wiped her tears and laughed a little. "Of course I have to become this." She then gave him a seething look and snarled, "It was all my fault. Go to hell!" She shouted at him and left. "You are finished from inside, Red." Lucifer said to himself, watching her leave. "What does your heart seek when you neither love me nor him?" He asked but knew he can't make any assumption as Red doesn't know herself what she is doing. On what heartbeats she placed her faith upon.