15- Never Noticed

Past Back in college time, Rayan knew his feelings for Isra were strong and he wanted to tell her for how long and how much he loves her, to confess the intense feeling building in his heart.He wanted her to know what she makes him feel, what he goes through. Finally after making his mind, He called her to expose what's inside his heart for a long time in front of her, to confess his unbearable passion for her which desires to wallow in her presence and love her perennially, "Isra.. I wanted to tell you this for a very long time." He said, rubbing his icy hand together, gulping hard to get ready before telling her, "What is it, Rayan?" She asked, tilting her head in confusion, "I know you are my best friend's sister..." He said, trying not to sound awkward and took a step closer, "What happened?" She asked, not getting what happened to him suddenly, "I like you. A lot." He asked and was about to continue, ready to tell her the speech of intense emotions he prepared especially for her but the expression of consternation on Isra's face was very telling and his sparks blew out, realizing it was all wrong, "Uh.. Rayan.." She tried to speak apologetically but he forced out a smile, not wanting to be away from her and make things awkward between them. Or else he would lose her completely, "You don't feel the same, do you?" He asked, still smiling. She nodded sadly, looking away. "I.. have never seen you in that perspective.. I mean yeah, you were always there when I needed someone the most but... I thought you did it because of Zain." She said nervously, trying not to hurt his emotions. "Why do you think my personal feelings were not involved?" He asked faintly. "I.. don't want this... Please. I had no idea you thought of me like that." She whispered, hugging herself and deep down she was aware of his passion but always tried to avoid it. He bit his lower lip and looked away for a second but then gave her a bright smile, "It's okay. I totally respect your choice. I should have known..." He mumbled the last part sadly, barely controlling himself. "Sorry." "No, it's okay. Forget what I just said. Can we be at least friends?" He asked expectantly, waving his hand in the air, shaking his head. She smiled and nodded, shaking hands with him, "Sure. Why not?" It was an entirely different matter we met today, my heart is bound to you for years. Rayan thought, hopelessly in love with her. Sure it hurts him to see she is not his but he can't force her. "You know you mean a lot to me, don't you, Rayan?" She asked softly, staring into his eyes. If it wasn't for your zeal. She thought. "You too." He whispered with in-depth emotions. "Then please don't ever break the pride of friendship I have put in our bond." She murmured sadly but his heart cracked and powerless before her he smiled and nodded, "Sure." And what happened later barely left it alive. They became friends, he loved to spend time with her, talking and laughing. To him, it was the best time of his life of being connected with her without having any connection. He never asked for more, what else he needed? He was smiling at her as they were in the library, she was reading a book but he couldn't take his eyes from her, wanting to tell her the love in his life is with her or else sorrows could knock on his hollow chest anytime. She noticed his look and asked, "What are you looking at?" You. "Jannat." He smiled, motioning to the girl behind her. "Oh, her. You like her?" She teased. He only chuckled and got out and left after patting her head, leaving her confused. That's another matter, I consider you my jannat (paradise) Later he came to know Isra was dating Edgar and this was the last extent of his patience, he was extremely aggravated to know she chose him not not him. Why that bastard? It's easy for her to give him a chance then why not me!? We are closer! "Why do you find different methods to torment me?" He asked himself, losing his patience. Infuriated, Rayan went to her and called her somewhere alone and asked dominantly, "Are you dating Edgar?" "Yeah.. Why?" She shrugged, oblivious of his rage. "Why?! He doesn't deserve you, Isra!" He shouted, hurt after confirming it from her that she loves him. "Rayan. Calm down." She said softly, trying to calm him but to no avail, his raging heart never wanted this. "I don't want to calm down! What's so great in him!? Why him!? What you saw in him that you can be in a relationship with him but not with me?" He shouted, breathing heavily as a tear pricked in his eyes, shaking in dismal and agony he couldn't say. She never understood, if they tried, he could show her he loves her, he could evoke love in her as well... only if she gives him a chance which was always out of his reach. She couldn't. "You? How come you meddle in between?! You know you are no more than a friend and I can't lose you over a damn relationship!" She shouted back at his absurd words, he immediately eased down, eyes widened for a bare moment, knowing he spoke too much, "No.. I didn't mean it like this. It's just he is not good for you, Isra." He tried to tell her softly, this time, "But, I Love him, Rayan." She whispered, breaking the leftover part of his heart as well. "What..?" His voice came out croaked, feeble, "Yes." She nodded. "Does Zain know about it?" "He does so you better stop interfering in my personal matters." She told her tenderly and began to walk away but he held her wrist, asking, "Wasn't I... your friend?" "Well, thank you friend for degrading my boyfriend. You know what? For a second I thought you had changed but no." She mocked, rolling her eyes. "You can't do this to us because of him. Please Isra, you know whatever bond I have means a lot to me." He pleaded, desperate. "Then why are you trying to break it?" She asked strictly. "I won't do it again but please don't leave me. Please, I won't do anything again but please don't." His voice broke, lips convulsing badly, frightened of what would happen if he lost her. Her eyes narrowed in compassion as she took a step closer, "I am not, Rayan." She smiled faintly, removing his hands. "Isra please..." He whispered hopelessly, hurriedly, hoarsely, "Please what?" Please become mine. "Please be happy." He smiled, moving away. "I will. You don't worry about it, okay?" She smiled back and left. "Take care." "You too." Later, Rayan still couldn't get this thought out of his mind, whatever he does for her is not in his control, he couldn't help himself. He went to a girl, "You like Edgar, don't you?" "Yeah, so what?" She shrugged. "Want me to hook you two up?" He offered. "How? He is already in a relationship, I barely doubt he would agree." She asked, curious to know how when he is already in a relationship. "Just do as I say." He smirked and left. Later he made up a scenario where it was shown Edgar cheated on her; he did, he left her for someone prettier but Rayan only initiated this depraved act so things could go the way he wants them to be. It's not that he was planning to expose his insincerity to Isra. He did this out of his own extremity. Later he received a call from Zain who was worried about his sister, "Rayan, go and check up on Isra, she was crying badly. That Edgar cheated on her and met me later to knock some sense into that bastard but for now, see her." He said tensely, "Okay, you don't worry, I am going there." He cut the wall and rushed to her side. I was right next to you but you didn't bother to call me. I was one call away but you never remember me in your darkest night. "Isra?! What happened?" He saw her crying in a park near their hostel, somewhere alone. He rushed to her side, "Rayan? What are you doing here?" She asked, trying to wipe her tears. "I was worried about you." He said softly, coming closer as she ended up crying, taking the weight on her chest as he helped her take out all this anguish on his shoulder and probably then realize how much he loves her but even after knowing, she never did. "Rayan.. I am so sorry for not listening to you... You were right... He was never loyal.. I am so sorry." She cried, holding his sleeves, shaking her tear glistening face, "Hey, it's okay. Zain told me everything. It's gonna be okay, I am sure you will meet someone better." He whispered, passing her a smile, what else mattered before her tears? Nothing. "How could he do this to me?!" She cried. "I am here for you." He assured her and got her water from the nearby store, "Here, drink some water..." Whispering sweet nothings, he tried his best to help her ease down and forget about that cheater, "Hey, Hey, don't cry. I can't bear your cries." He said, holding her hands, stroking them affectionately. "Please don't leave me." "I am here." "Just you watch we will beat that shit up for breaking your heart. He will regret losing a gem like you." He comforted her, providing her equanimity from this ordeal, supporting her knowing he was the base of misery but he at least alleviated her heartbreak. They remained like this, he was sitting beside her, holding her hand while she rested her head on his shoulder, eyes closed and passed out, he smiled, circling her knuckles, whispering sweetly, "I am here... I was always here... You just never noticed."