33- Revelation of His Love
Present
When things turned upside down, towards the tunnels of agony on this auspicious day. Pouring their hearts into nothingness, everyone was exhausted from the breakage of emotions.
Rayan went home and soon after Isra also went back with a weak and wretched heart to think she broke his heart and feelings twice.
Entering, she rushed to her room, ripping the jewelry from her skin, taking short breaths, pushing the hairs falling on her face.
Why do things shatter between us before they could start?
She asked herself, covering her mouth to not cry.
He was a patient of love and she had no cure.
Not wanting to think much about it, Isra tried to sleep but couldn't, she can't neglect it anymore. Her heart was not at serene, the prick of her heart deprived her of sleep, scoffing, she got up worried about him.
She went to see Rayan.
Swallowing hard, she decided not to end matters like before. Knocking, she entered when no response came and saw him sitting on the ground, hugging himself, trembling.
The sniffling sound was the presage of how long he had been crying beside those red and puffy eyes.
Her eyes softened for a moment to see him like this, she was seeing him in a devastated condition like this for the first time, without knowing he was used to this ravage.
"R... Rayan..."
Her shaky voice called, coming closer, his sleeves were rolled to his elbow roughly, his tie was loose, hairs scattered over his face, in a state of perfect mess.
His voice halted after sensing she was in front of him. He quickly wiped his eyes and stood up, calling her softly.
"Isra? W-What.. Are you doing.. Here?" He asked hesitantly, wiping his eyes continuously to annihilate his tears.
Narrowing her eyes in compassion she whispered, "What have you done to yourself?" She was about to touch his face to wipe his tears of anguish but he yanked her hand back.
"Don't..." His voice came out inaudible.
"I have bore this pain before. I can do it now too." He mumbled, moving back.
Unable to raise his fragmented eyes but she moved closer with her eyes tearing up to see him like this.
"Why.. are you doing this to yourself?" She asked, clutching his shirt between her fingers.
"Why can't you move on from me? It was years ago, Rayan. Why do my words hurt the same? How can I break you so much when I don't intend to? Why, Rayan? Why do you hurt yourself on my path?" She asked in a broken tone.
"You are asking why?" He asked breathlessly, putting his hand over hers, curling his lips upwards painfully.
"Isn't it simple?"
"I never stopped loving you. I have loved you all this time. With my every breath, with my soul, with my heart beats. Your name was carved on my heart for longer I could remember and you ask why? It was crystal, I love you. I love you, Isra."
Sniffing his dejected phase converted into fury, growling,
"I tried to move on, to forget you but I can't do it, not when you are finally mine!" He shouted, startling her.
Losing his senses, he began to dig the grave of his heart, finally tell her what she has done to him.
"They say you become selfless in love, they were wrong! Love makes you do things you never imagined you would do! It breaks your heart, it makes you possessive, love is not what people think it is, it is the worst emotions, it makes you senseless and you lose the track of your own identity." He hissed, confessing what she was making him go through.
"Love is not a beautiful feeling, Isra. It's the darkest phase of your life and mine has started..."
He continued to burst his overwhelming untold emotions while her stunned form tried to comprehend his heartbreaking words with tears in her eyes.
He moved closer, adjacent to her ears, whispering, "...Since the moment I met you."
He confessed as her eyes widened in disbelief, staring at his face with a few tears rolling down her cheeks, "Stop loving me this much."
"I know you are afraid of it but believe me, I will change. I promise I will, just guide me, I will become what you are, I will become a better man for you. Let me offer my remaining breaths to remove this fright from your heart, Isra. I swear I will not break your pride. Please give me a chance, You mean the world to me, I cannot afford to lose you again."
He pleaded, placing the deepest request before her.
"I am trying Rayan but it's hard. You terrify me, I am scared, I couldn't..." She replied, pulling his shirt, locking her orbs with his desperate ones.
"Please.. I love you a lot. Give me a chance, I will do whatever I can, please Isra Please, I love you so much, please."
At this point, he began to sob, putting his head on her shoulder, he let out his wails of misery, broken from her dream questioning his fate of never having her in the lines of his palm.
"Please, please, please don't neglect me again, I can't live without you. Don't throw me out again. I love you, I love you so much, Isra, more than anything." He cried, repeating his begging.
Unable to bear it, Isra hugged him back, running her hand in his hairs, whispering sweet nothings in his ear to ease his broken state and thundering cries hurting her by each passing second.
Why did I never realize it before? How could it take me too long to recognize this state?
Making him sit back on the bed as she bent on the ground, taking his hands in hers.
"Rayan, Rayan, Listen. Look at me. Don't cry, look at me. It's okay, don't cry." She whispered, kissing her hands.
Looking back up at her with tears streaming down his face by the untold emotions which reached the depth of the abyss where his prayer was heard.
"Please don't leave me, I beg you. I can't live without, I will become the way you want but please don't leave me, I love you so much Isra, please, I beg you, please."
His panting murmur at par with his heartbreaking sob connected his suffering with her heart.
"I am not. I am here with you. I won't leave you again. Don't cry anymore, please." She whispered, whimpering to find herself as his culprit which left him in desolation.
Tightening her grip on his hand, "I am with you."
After hearing he couldn't take it anymore, he pulled her in his embrace. "I love you, I love you, I love you so much Isra."
"I know... I know you do... more than anything." She replied softly, smiling feebly.
Rubbing his back as they remained like this and Rayan spent his night under her shades of redemption scattering solace in his lap and providing him with the warmth he never hoped to receive.
This moment was the revelation of his love...