Chapter 055

"Vienna." I stood up immediately when I heard Mother Selda's voice. I opened the door and let her into my room. I saw that she was carrying a large box but I had no idea what was in it. "Please forgive me," she said suddenly and hugged me tightly. "Are your memories back?" She asked and I shook my head in response. We both sat on the bed and I suddenly sighed. Maybe this is the right time for me to ask her about Martin. "Mother Selda, do you know who Martin is?" She couldn't answer immediately. I cried, I couldn't imagine that she would keep it a secret from me. "Yes I know him but not only me but also your mom and brother especially your dad," she replied to my surprise. Did Dad know Martin? Why wasn't be able to tell me when we were together in the US? Sister Fiona said, only Mom and Brother know him but even Dad lied to me? "Vienna, dear, let your mom explain everything to you." "How well does Dad know Martin?" I asked seriously. "He knew Martin very well, he considered him his son," replied Mother Selda. Why wasn't be able to tell me about Martin when he was still alive? Why did I only now find out when he was dead? "Your mom knows all that happened after you had the accident. Please let her explain everything to you." I hugged Mother Selda. My mind was a mess, I no longer knew who I should believe and trust. They all broke the trust I had given in them. I can no longer face them, I get hurt when I see them. "Vienna, here inside the box is everything you want to know about your past and who Martin is in your life. Open it when you're ready, I don't want to see you hurt and struggling. Forgive me if I kept it a secret from you, I didn't mean to." "Don't worry, I won't be angry with you and I understand you. Thank you for your help, I'll take care of everything, and don't worry about me." Whatever this box contains, hopefully, it will help me bring back all my memories. Hopefully, everything will be clear to me, and I won't be hurt by what I can find out. "Mother Selda, who is Martin in my life?" my last question made me nervous. "He was the only man you loved back then, just him and no one else." Now, I know the answer. *** Time Check: 8:08 pm (Vienna, don't force yourself too much, okay? Let your memories come out in your mind) I suddenly called my psychiatrist, I told her what happened earlier. She needs to know what's happening to me, she knows everything about how I can overcome this kind of situation. "Yes doc, I'll do that." (Good, I know you want to remember everything about your past. Honestly, when you told me that, I was surprised. I never imagined that through these years you had a vision out of nowhere about that guy named Martin) "Even though I was surprised, just because of that teddy bear I remembered that incident." (This is my last advice, look for things connected to Martin. Try to ask your mom or your brother about it. It will help you Vienna but if it's hard for you to find it, you need to undergo another therapy) I don't want to undergo therapy anymore, I've done it a few times before but nothing happened. I don't even have one to remember, even my age or where I live I don't know. "I don't want to undergo therapy anymore, in fact, Mother Selda gave me a box. The contents are the things connected to my past, especially to Martin. But I'm not yet ready to open that box, I'm nervous and afraid of what I might find out," I replied. (I understand you Vienna, don't force yourself okay? If you're ready you'll open it. But Vienna you need to hear the side of your mom and brother so that everything will be clearer to you. It may be hard for you to accept it but there's nothing that we can do, we can't change the situation. Vienna, don't forget that I'm just here too, if you need my help just call me right away, okay?) "Yes doc, thank you." (You're welcome Vienna, take care) I don't know if I can accept everything. I'll pray that I will accept everything no matter what has happened in my past. I left home early even though I was still lacking in sleep and hadn't eaten breakfast yet. That scenario didn't put me to sleep, I kept thinking and remembering about him, but I couldn't remember what Martin looked like. I didn't force myself anymore, my head was starting to hurt. Doc is right, I'm the only one who's going to have a hard time so I've stopped thinking about it. Because I was too lazy to drive my car, I used my motorbike to go to university. This is my Dad's gift on my 18th birthday but I don't use it much because my mom stopped me from using it. I'm being careful, I don't want to have another accident because I might disappear from the world forever. When I arrived at the university, everyone was looking at me but I just let it go. When I parked my motorbike and took off my helmet, they were all shocked. Maybe they're not used to it because not a single woman drives a motorbike here at university. "Wow, she's cool." 'She's Vince's sister, Vienna is beautiful, isn't she?" "Yeah, then she has beautiful a voice." Those are just a few of the things I hear around. I just got off my motorbike and left the parking lot. I entered the entrance but they were still looking at me. I got to the room but Therese was not there and there were only a few of us. "Vienna, your motorbike was cool, it's cooler when the woman drives," Mike said when he entered the room. I was just forced to smile at him, I immediately regretted why I used that and brought it here. "Vienna, good morning," Therese greeted me. It's a good thing she arrived and it's her birthday tomorrow. What good things can the three of us do? "Good morning Therese," I replied. "Are you okay? You seem to be lacking in sleep. Did something happen when you came home? Didn't your mom agree?" She asked worriedly. She sat down and held my hand. I was really lucky that she became my friend. "I'm fine, I'm just lacking in sleep and mom agreed to Billy's adoption and she will be the guardian," I replied. "That's good, but why don't you seem happy?" "I'm happy of course." "Vienna, always remember that Michelle and I are always here. If you have a problem, tell us okay?" She said softly, I nodded in response. "Don't worry if there's anything I'll tell you right away, promise." I lied, I didn't want to tell them my problem. I don't want them to worry about me, I want to face it alone. I don't want to hurt them either because of the problem I'm facing.