30.2- Important Talks

'Eileen." His stern tone came, putting his phone away, giving me all his unasked attention. 'I believe I told you we need to talk." He sighed, gesturing to me to come closer. 'You did? I don't remember." I asked nervously, tugging my hair behind, coming closer. 'Come." He called, motioning to sit right next to him. My legs felt numb, my ability to speak felt hindered. I was about to sit next to him but he grabbed my wrist and pulled me into his laps. Convulsing, I stilled at his action. His one hand was secured around my waist to ensure I was trapped in his arena while his other hand rested on my neck, linking his eyes keenly with mine. Swallowing hard at the lack of silence, I curled my toes when he only stared deeply into my eyes as if to contemplate something beyond his comprehension, moving his thumb slowly across my jawline. For a raw second, compassion flashed in his eyes, pulling me closer. I held his shirt involuntarily, hoping to find anything behind this maze but failed. After a devilishly long period of testing my endurance, he breathed out, 'For the last time, Eileen." My grip tightened on his shirt, narrowing my eyes to mentally prepare for whatever he was going to speak. 'The man you married was a nothing but deceptive image." He began to tell me dominantly. Not leaving me so I could stare into his eyes and eradicate the image I had in my mind and replace it with the one he is etching. 'You are breaking your heart for something which never existed. You are not in love with me but with the image you have created in my mind and now when I am not what you thought I am- It's breaking your heart." He sighed, stabbing my heart by his cold statement which was only good if used as a consolation- and we both did. For ourselves. "But, in reality what you saw was a fake dream. I was never what you saw. Then who did you fall for in the first place? Because it was not me. You never loved me." It was painful how smoothly he called my love nothing… He explained in a low but firm resonance what I was unable to put into words without hesitation. Without caring if it would hurt or not. 'That's the worst part of it, that I attached my heart to what's non-existent. But, is it my fault? Was feeling love for my fiancé wrong?" I whispered in a broken voice, hoping somewhere in his heart he could understand my condition. "I know, I know, you had no fault. You did what you were supposed to do, felt what you should have but didn't continue it anymore. Don't feel anything for me." He said softly but if it was possible I would have done it long ago. Why did he think I shared my feelings in the first place? "Don't bring us back to that point, Sebastian. I have told you, I cannot control what I should feel." I replied, heartbroken that his vacuous mind cannot understand that. Of course, feelings are foreign to him. 'Exactly, Eileen. You are breaking your heart needlessly. Snap out of that ruse. You think I will be like that again, I won't. Don't compare me." He whispered, moving his thumb across my skin to make me understand. "Don't scream, Eileen." He whispered hopelessly, leaving me astounded to fathom that my voice was still echoing in his empty place. 'I don't want to either but looking at you breaks my heart, my emotions are uncontrollable. And It's not about who you were but who you are." With a croaky voice, I was no longer capable of upholding myself. "It hurts, Sebastian, because you don't feel anything." I whispered back desperately as he sighed in disappointment, almost infuriated. My words were making an impact and he resented it. 'Fine then, I can be like that too. The so-called love of your life but it would be nothing but a false hope, a fake personality. Would it be enough to mend your heart?" He asked exasperatedly, twitching his brows together in discontent, considering my pain meaningless only to subdue my voice. 'Is that what you desire?" He asked again angrily, pulling our faces together. Dominance dripped from his aura, demanding an answer. 'No." I whimpered, shaking my head in denial. Shivering a little, not wanting him to act like that again. He exhaled, calming down, "Then stop bringing this up. I am making you understand softly." He said, biting the inside of my check, I nodded when his supremacy came back with much darkness. "Also, I have slid your audacity this time but there won't be a next, understand?" He warned sternly, definitely not liking how I entered his mind and ruptured the flow of his damn melodious screams. 'Yes." Nodding, I looked down when he parted his hand from my skin. 'You have dared to disrespect me. Don't you ever do this again, don't make me break my limits." He whispered, letting it go with a warning. 'I-I am sorry…" I whispered back, tensing up when his assertive eyes studied my form. Humming he pulled me down from his laps, leaning back and resting his one leg over the other. 'Also, stop taking those contraceptive pills your friend gave you." He ordered strictly. 'You know?" I asked, taken aback. 'Who else could it be? Only she had the nerves." He sighed. I didn't want to enrage him further than I already did so I hummed. 'O-Okay." And, we are back to the point from where we started again. My emotions had no effect. He heard my voice yet chose not to react. I don't mean- 'I have made an appointment with the gynecologist. Consult her first before taking any random pill. Who knows what side effects it might have." He muttered, rolling his eyes off, frowning deeply. 'What?" I blinked, thinking I heard him wrong. 'I said consult a doctor first." He shrugged, arching a brow at me because I was astonished, not expecting he would allow this. 'I-I didn't expect you would… let me…" I trailed off, unsure how to react or what to speak. 'Dealing with one brat is enough, I am no longer in the mood for another." He taunted, glaring at me while referring to me as a brat. My lips formed a thin line, I remained motionless. 'Besides, your body is too weak." He mumbled in a low voice to himself but I heard it. I won't deny, I had always been low on iron and vitamins so I doubt I could give birth normally in the first place. 'Anyways, keep my words in your mind." He sighed, getting up to go to sleep but I held his sleeves innocently, looking back into his profound gaze timidly. 'Sebastian," I called, not leaving his sleeves. He didn't react, waiting for me to continue. 'Did you.. Truly hear me?" I asked hesitantly, unsure how these words reached my lips in the first place. His jaw clenched, features hardened as he yanked his hand back. Not liking how I addressed his two moments of weakness. He was utterly displeased. 'No. I lied to make you stop your whining." He lied, pulling away but I know he heard me because if my voice hadn't reached him then he wouldn't be telling me to stop staying in his fake memories. I had been going on about it for a while but he reacted only this time all because he heard and I didn't know whether I should be happy or not…